Unimaginable Miracle

I can truly say that my wife’s pregnancy is a miracle, given that her menstrual cycle is irregular and she hadn’t had her period since July of last year before getting pregnant.

We got married last November 2023, and as busy working individuals, we haven’t had our honeymoon phase yet.

Fast forward to January of the following year, my wife noticed that her stomach was growing and thought it was the result of the holiday season’s feasting. She worked out every morning to reduce the bulging of her tummy, thinking it was a buildup of fat since she was irregular and her last period was in July of the previous year. We decided to verify it using a pregnancy test and found out that she was already pregnant.

To make the story short, God blessed us with a baby who was already 5 weeks along.

“Feeling of Excitement”

I announced the pregnancy on March 5 via Facebook Reels, https://web.facebook.com/reel/386860314106028, showing clips of our activities prior to knowing about the pregnancy. We were really excited as we talked about possible names for our child, not knowing the gender. We even considered Korean names: Ji-Eun if it’s a girl, and Jongsuk if it’s a boy.

“Feeling of Uneasiness”

As busy people, we often forget about our health and spend more time working than keeping ourselves healthy. We received some not-so-good news: the growth of our baby was restricted. The ultrasound result indicated a possible IUGR, which resulted in an adaptive phenomenon called “brain sparing,” where the baby focuses the blood supply to the head and less on the body.

From that moment, we started to monitor my wife’s lifestyle and diet.

“Feeling of Anxiety”

Fast forward, I won’t share any more details, but during our last consultation with my wife’s OB on Monday, August 19, she mentioned that the baby’s development is so slow that even at my wife’s 35th week, the baby’s body development is equivalent to 30 weeks. She also said that my wife’s pregnancy is too risky for a normal delivery, and we have no other choice but to proceed with a C-section, with the possibility of giving birth to our son prematurely.

That day after the consultation, I was thankful to God for having a strong-willed and strong personality wife who managed to keep my emotions stable. At that moment, all the times I prioritized work over my wife’s health came flooding back, making me feel like an unreliable husband. I hadn’t cried for a long time, but that day, I cried relentlessly inside our car while my wife was waiting in line to purchase her medicine. 

As much as I wanted to, I didn’t want my wife to see that part of me, as it might affect her as well. But I couldn’t hide it, and it was the worst feeling I’ve ever experienced in my entire life. I told God that I didn’t like that feeling, as it consumed my rationality while being behind the wheel.

“Finding God’s peace”

It is hard to work and do your best when you know there’s a risk of losing someone you love.

The good thing is that we have family, friends, and co-workers we can lean on and share some of the weight as we face these challenges and trials. With all this in mind, I asked for temporary leave from work to focus on my wife’s health and pregnancy.

Before I asked for leave, my wife had been admitted to the ER due to an unpredictable rise in her blood pressure and unexpected fever every night. She also needed two bags of RBC due to a low level of hemoglobin, hence the reason for my requested leave.

At the hospital, my wife stayed in the ER for pregnant patients for two days before she was admitted to the Labor Room for monitoring. Inside the ER facilities, the patient is allowed to be accompanied by a guardian, and cellphones are allowed. However, in the Labor Room, no one is allowed, not even communication devices. She stayed in the Labor Room for almost a week, monitoring her blood pressure and the baby’s heartbeat, as her amniotic fluid was also below normal levels.

Not being allowed to accompany my wife, I was only in the waiting area, as there was no available room for her yet, waiting for the nurses inside with her to give instructions on what to buy or whatever she requested or needed.

In most cases, my wife doesn’t want to bother her guardians during the night, so she just asks for things she will need, such as food and water for the day. But we still need to stay just in case there are things the nurses need to buy for her.

I use the wee hours to monitor some tasks at work and also to review some medical terms to be able to relate to the nurses and doctors. While working, some verses from the Bible pop into my mind, and I start to reread some passages.

“From Birth to Discharge”

Job Kian was born healthy via normal spontaneous delivery, as the doctor who assisted in delivering the baby said, weighing 1.77 kg at birth. During the first days of his life, he built a bonding relationship with his mother through breastfeeding. Due to our inexperience in nurturing a baby, Job Kian experienced aspiration, which caused him to be transferred to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU). His pediatrician recommended stopping breastfeeding until further notice. We were asked to sign a consent form to conduct procedures that would assist in Job Kian’s recovery, including the administration of IV fluids to maintain his blood sugar. Due to his size and weight, it was recommended to conduct an Umbilical Vein Catheterization to administer the fluids directly via his navel. He was also put under oxygen since his respiration was not stable. His blood was also tested to check for any concerns.

At this point, many things were flowing through my mind, but I felt calm when I thought of my God who is in control of everything. By the grace of God, the oxygen was removed overnight, and he was allowed to be fed by his mother the next morning.

On his 4th day, the result of his blood test was reviewed, and the nurse assigned to monitor him informed us of the bad news. The result showed traces of bacteria (E. coli), and his pediatrician recommended undergoing antibiotic treatment to prevent the propagation of the bacteria.

As a first-time parent without much knowledge and understanding of how the body works, I felt very anxious about the health of our first baby. I always include in my prayers that God uses the doctors and nurses assigned to him to improve his health.

“The name Job Kian”

Prior to the hospital journey, just after the last consultation with the OB, I started to look for names that we wanted to name our child. Because of the negative news we received and the sudden burst of emotion I experienced, I began to reflect on some Bible stories and characters. The first one that came to mind was Job, a good and prosperous family man in the Bible who, despite the disasters God allowed him to experience, stayed faithful.

The second name, Kian, resulted from finding a name with a good meaning and following our initial plan of giving our child a Korean name (키안).

Kian’s origin is Persian, meaning “King,” as well as an Irish variation meaning “Ancient” or “Enduring One.” It is a lovely way to inspire the baby’s old soul and a long, prosperous life. There is also a Hindu variation, “Kiaan,” meaning “Grace of God.”

“Job” is a reminder for me that whatever happens, God will be praised and thanked.

“Kian” is for him, who endured his journey before coming into this world by the Grace of God, and will endure the life he will live in this world as well.

“Reflection of Faith”

Because of this experience, I fully realize that you cannot control everything except your emotions and reactions. Anything outside my control, I will ask and let God take over it for I know and it is written.